So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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