Its about making memories worth repressing
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
