Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
