I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
