Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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