Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
