what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
