you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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