he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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