just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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