ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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