As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
