Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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