They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
