What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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