I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
