yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
