Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize