You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
