he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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