4 words: hood of his car
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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