I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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