did you get engaged???
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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