If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
