I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Just high enough for therapy.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
