speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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