Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Randomize
