this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
