do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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