I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Its about making memories worth repressing
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
