I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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