Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
this will be a night to untag.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
