Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
