Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
