would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
