No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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