We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
he quoted the bible to break up with me
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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