the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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