idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
