What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
