If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Someone signed my nipple.
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