he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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