Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
