I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
