There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
