omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
