is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Randomize
