never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I FOUND THE LEGS
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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