No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
the room spins SO much faster in panama
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
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