i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
