The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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